Sleepless nights

So we are packed to leave for Shiners in the morning and I should be sleeping. It is 1:34 am and I am watching some kids movie instead of sleeping. I just took a anxiteiy pill to help calm the nerves and hopefullly make me sleepy soon but until then I will write. I am lucky b/c I almost took a prescription diet pill instead which would not help me to sleep.. lol. Precrtiption speed would not be good. OK so I am not a drugie, really just overweight and a mom... so meds are in order. I think every omom I know is on some short of medication, I think it goes with the terrority. YOu have new worries when you become a mom, worries you did not think you would ever have and then add a special needs child to that and well I think it just doubles. So onto the Shinners, we have a doctors appointment on Wednesday morning and hope for some new good news! I will post more when we know.. until then I am going to try and sleep

I wish

Last night I went to the "Point of Grace and Mark Schultz" concert so my title comes from on the songs performed at the concert. This year I turned 35 and have come to making some life changes and so the the song " I wish" just says some of the things that I have been thinking about. I guess this year for me is about making sure my life is on the path that I would like for it to be on. I am in the early middle but really this is the time that defines who you are going to be. I think my 20's were for discovery and my 30's should be about directions. I don't exactly know where this is going or what I am saying. I feel like I am in the wilderness and just trying to figure out what my next step/path is. Maybe it is a step,....one at a time. All I know is I feel like I need to decide quick b/c life moves fast and is not slowing down,only speeding up.